A couple of years ago, my life went into a downward spiral, and I did not really do much to stop it. Rather, I guess I just let my mental problems take hold, and I did not do much about it. It almost felt relieving, in a way, to not fight the anxiety that I was experiencing, and to just give into its embrace. I don’t know if that makes much sense, but it sickens me to say it now. I want to start to learn about social anxiety, and what I can do to deal with it. This is part of a process where I am going to try to turn my life around, because things have gotten pretty ugly over the last couple of years.
I stopped leaving my house, to a large extent, and I began to avoid people. It is not pleasant to admit this, and I might start crying as I type. I think it is important to be honest though, and to face my condition. That is the only way that I am going to be able to begin the process of getting better, which is something that I desperately want to be able to do. I know that I can’t continue to live my life this way, because it is just soul crushing to live in isolation. I thought I liked it at first, but that was just my anxiety speaking.
Right now, I am mostly curious in learning about different ways to deal with social anxiety, and to overcome it. I understand that I have a long road towards recovery ahead of me, but I think that I have the strength to get through this. I mean, I don’t want to give up on my life, and I still have hope that I can have a good life.